At ConductorOne, we talk to security and IT teams every day. And we’ve noticed a troubling trend. We’re not doctors, but the symptoms are hard to ignore:
- Chronic provisioning pain
- Sudden spikes in screenshot stress
- A deep, irrational fear of quarterly UARs
- Persistent audit-induced nausea
After years of watching identity pros suffer in silence, we’re finally giving the condition a name: Identity Governance Anxiety Disorder. IGAD, for short.
The symptoms are everywhere
You might have IGAD if you’ve experienced any of the following:
Overpermission Ulceritis: The stress of everyone having admin access, from your interns to your CFO’s dog walker. You know the feeling: key sprawl, SaaS sprawl, and the constant pit in your stomach that comes from knowing you’re one dormant user away from a breach.
Provisioner’s Elbow: An overuse injury caused by clicking “Add user” in the admin panel 14,000 times a day. Classic side effect of legacy IGA tools (and, frankly, of not using ConductorOne yet).
Attestaphobia: The paralyzing fear of being hunted down by your auditors. “Just send a screenshot,” they say. “It’ll be quick,” they say. Next thing you know, you’re trapped in a week-long Slack thread labeled URGENT: Access Evidence.
The cure?
ConductorOne. The only identity automation platform built for the modern era. One where AI agents, humans, and NHIs all need access, but none of them should be using credentials from 2021.
It’s clinically proven to treat symptoms like Overpermission Ulceritis, Provisioner’s Elbow, and moderate to severe Attestaphobia. Side effects may include:
- Increased productivity
- Spontaneous high-fives
- Dramatically reduced audit-related stress
- Mild disbelief that provisioning could ever be this easy
- Improved posture
- Regained will to live
- Involuntary dancing during access reviews
- And the ability to sleep through the night without dreaming about spreadsheets
In rare cases, users reported joy, purpose, and a deep emotional connection to their CISO.
Feeling seen? You might be eligible for a demo and a full IGAD recovery plan. Ask your CISO if ConductorOne is right for you.
